Calmer Parents, Calmer KidsDecember 13, 2019
A parent’s vibe translates to their child. So a great way to stay balanced as a parent and individual is to practice mindfulness daily. Below are a few things to consider if you want to keep your children from absorbing anxiety in or around the home.
Test Scores and Anxiety
Sometimes children get test taking anxiety. Usually the root of that is some pressure received at home to get a specific grade, or just pressure from things happening around the home. Since grades are important, let’s consider the approach to take when preparing children for an exam. Here are some tips on what to say and what not to say to a child who’s studying for an exam.
What to say: Just know that whatever happens, you’re safe.
What not to say: If you don’t get a good grade, you cannot watch TV for a week.
Now, although the intentions are good for the what-not-to-say version, the outcome-oriented discipline might ultimately scare the child. A child who feels frightened into doing the right thing will usually act from a frightened mind.
From my own personal experience, and from working with mostly the anxious population, I’ve come to see that treating grades with a compassionate approach allows the child to hold space for themselves, and to perform in a more relaxed manner.
Tips for the Parent
Now, back to the parent. What is happening internally will be communicated to the child. If you want a calm child, the child has to grow up in a calm environment. Here are some tips I give parents and their children to remain grounded when facing daily challenges.
1. Show gratitude for yourself.
2. It’s okay to ask for help.
3. Find two minutes in your day to take a deep breath: in through the nose, and out through the mouth. Breath work like this balances out the nervous system, sending more calming and fewer anxious signals to our minds. This then manifests itself through calmer conversations with children.
5. Nourish your body.
6. Drink water, eat when you are hungry, use the restroom when needed.
7. Sometimes we, and our children, need to be reminded that it’s okay to take a moment and do what you need to do.
When we practice this mindful work, we can use it to be calmer parents, too. That vibration will then translate to your children. The ultimate goal is not to be the perfect parent; the ultimate goal is to connect to your child on a level that adds to their already whole feeling. If your child is scared or worried of what you will do or say, that is a good reason to take a deep breath and find a more compassionate way to reach them, without allowing the anxiety of the outcome to take over. I am here to assist you in staying grounded while keeping your child on track in all areas. I look forward to helping you in this journey so you can impart positivity to your children.
Certified Kids Yoga and Mindfulness Instructor